as i stare at my computer drifting away into the blank space of my mind, i desperately want to write my play; i do! i’m actually incredibly excited to begin writing it…yet i find myself completely and utterly lost at a words to begin writing it.
i don’t know if it’s the lack of sugar in my system (wrong; i’m drinking Vitamin B Natural Sugars Starbucks Refreshers right now) or the lack of coffee (wrong; i just had a mug full @ my great friend’s house this afternoon) or the lack of sleep (maybe? but i got 6+ hours last night so, that should be fine). regardless, i’m not writing my one act play. i’m writing on my blog about not being able to write.
i’m such a hypocrite.
still, the internet has been seeing inside my soul as it shows me ad after ad for three topping dominos pizza and instant coffee. i battle those thoughts, eating red cabbage and spinach leaves instead–rather tasty to be honest; i love veggies. as my mind tries to relax and put itself in the right frame, i debate whether to move from the spot with free coffee and a somewhat pleasurable aesthetic to somewhere that i have no idea where. >.<;;;
breathing isn’t difficult.
writing isn’t difficult.
starting is difficult.
and if no where is going to help me start, where should i go? i desperately need to write this. as in, i don’t/shouldn’t even go to the gym because that’s how badly i need to write this. when something takes priority over THAT, it’s d*** near important. (there was a pause of about five minutes here.)
maybe if i just switch tables….i’ll be able to work better. i think that’ll do it. or i could just go back to my apartment and study in the comfort of my floor and rearrange my room to make it even better? nah, there’s no way to rearrange my room and i write better at a table. so i think i’ll just move to another table at this same location facing the NORTH rather than the south. -breathes deeply-